Fearing life...

I believe that our brains have the magnificent capacity to hold everything- every little detail we have ever encountered.  The only problem is finding our way to each hidden piece.  That is the idea, at least, behind the book I started today- Sybil.  It is the story of a woman with 16 personalities, one of whom is responsible for Sybil's memories because they are too painful for Sybil herself to remember.  And, so it is with all of us.  Our memories are hidden back in some corner, some dark and dusty attic that every once in a while we are lucky enough to reach into, but that most of the time remains elusive, locked to our present consciousness.  What brings this to mind is an experience I had yesterday.

I was at a meeting for work.  My boss was showing us a presentation on her computer concerning a program that provides audio versions of books for students.  As I looked at the screen, I quickly glanced over all of the books she has downloaded over the years.  I'm always on the lookout for new material, but really I was looking for anything I might find familiar.  My eyes stopped on Tuck Everlasting.  I vaguely remembered the story.  I must've read it in school or something.  And, immediately a picture of the movie version's poster jumped into my brain, and I thought, Alexis Bledel is in that movie!

The movie came out in 2002, which must've been when I saw that poster.  I, however, lame as I am, came into the Gilmore Girls late in life, circa last year.  So, back in '02, I had no clue who Alexis Bledel was, nor did I have any intention on watching the movie.  But somewhere back in a corner of my mental attic that image was waiting for me, waiting for the day that the name Alexis Bledel would mean something to me, waiting for yesterday.  As quickly as that image appeared, I decided I wanted to see the movie.  Anything with Alexis in it is prize-winning material, in my opinion.     

Luckily, it was on Netflix Instant Play, so I watched it.  Wow.  Not only is Alexis Bledel the main character, but she has my name!  Winnie.  Well, my nickname.  The one my family has called me since birth.  It made me realize how much I love that name.  The scenery in the movie is just gorgeous, and the storyline is amazing.  It's stories like these that make me want to be a writer.  The author, Natalie Babbitt, takes a common human fear and turns it into beautiful empowerment.  I will not give away the plot here, but I will include the most powerful line in the story.  As I heard Tuck speak it, I felt as though he were speaking directly to me.  It helped that he was using my name.


"Don't fear death, Winnie.  Fear the unlived life."

Speaking of death, this dead banana spider was dropped on my hammock's doorstep this afternoon by  a much smaller flying insect.  I tried to snap a shot of the tiny bug carrying it around.  It was pretty amazing.  But anytime I got near them, he became defensive and guarded his kill by staring me down.  He won.