Finding my motivation...

Tonight I got into a discussion with my husband about volunteerism and general good will.  Ever since reading The Upside of Rationality, I question the motivation behind all human action.  Dan Ariely would be so proud.  I wondered aloud: what drives people to generate good will, from a simple smile to moving across the world to care for others in a foreign nation?  And, does the reason matter, or only the action that results?

I have written before about how I feel religion regards the call to treat others as you wish to be treated as a rule, a guideline for entering heaven.  If this is the reason for performing any one action, isn't the action selfish, and even worse, contrived?  And, yet if we do something for the reason of making ourselves look better- to others or to ourselves, isn't that equally as contrived and selfish?   And, if we do it simply because we want to, then isn't that the definition of selfish?  So, are there any pure motives?

I started to think about what people can truly trust.  Often we regret our own decisions, and fault others for theirs.  So we cannot be trusted to follow our own motivation.  Even following black and white rules, such as those laid out by different religions, can lead to poor outcomes.  We all know life is nothing if not a tumble of grays and blues.

So life itself is the only thing that can truly be trusted.  In other words, if something happens that is out of our control, we are forced to accept it as the way the world should be, because it is, and there could be no other option.  So then life itself, or God, or the Universe, whatever you may call it, is the one pure driving force behind all action.  So how do we tap into that?  How do we know our decisions are governed by life and not our own nearsighted vision?

In order to find the answer I went to the only thing I know, and that is my own experience.  All decisions I have made, big and small, that have resulted in a successful outcome (at least as would seem by my own flawed intelligence) were made with the simple goal of coming closer to life.  What does this mean?  It is similar to that feeling when you're driving down an empty road listening to a super rockin' song with the windows down and the sun setting on the horizon.  That feeling when you know that you are experiencing the magic known as life.  All of my time here consists of the journey to find that feeling.  And the closer I come to it, the more at peace I feel, which is my personal sign of a well-lived life.

So, I have concluded that for me the sole goal must be to unite with life.  And anything that brings me closer to life is something to be trusted.  And that, to my mind, is the only pure motivation there can be.

Taking a quick sidestep from the B&W Study.  I visited Okefenokee Swamp this weekend, and hung out with the alligators.  This dude was definitely eyeing us like a velociraptor on the hunt.  Now that I have my weekends to myself, it is much easier for me to chill with life.  This weekend being out in the middle of the swamp, listening to rad old country tunes, hanging with my best friend after 6 months of not seeing her, listening to the thunder, taking photos, I definitely accomplished my goal.  Now, I just need to work on accomplishing it when I am at work and engaged in the seeming drudgery of the day to day.